Sunday, January 18, 2009

I will survive

I am divorced with two beautiful children. I was married for eleven years. I thought we were going to grow old together. Nothing last forever. I have been separated for three years and divorced for over a year.Divorce can be a traumatic experience, especially when children are involved. Children and parents having to adjust to lifestyle changes. While going through my divorce, I didn't realize the many obstacles that I would have to face. I was use to a two family income, now it's different when you have only one income. I didn't realize that my stress level would triple due to the frustration of money, relationships,work and the economy. I felt that I was the only one going through this life changing experience. As I met other single and divorced people with or without children, I realized I was not the only one. I wrote this post because I wanted others to know that they are not alone and that you can survive a divorce or being single. I have experienced everything from depression, loneliness, dating and being at peace. It's through the grace of God that I was able to survive.
I can remember the day when I said I do. When I promised to marry for better or for worst, for richer or poorer, Till death do us part. I remember standing before family and friends making a promise to you and God. To love and cherish you forever... Eleven years has passed us by and we asking ourselves, how did we get to this point? We don't talk like we use to. We don't laugh like we use to. What happened to our marriage?Now here we stand before the court. Exchanging unpleasant stares from one another. We're fighting over property kids and money. We were once two now we are one. Starting from scratch. We are having to pick up the pieces from this jigsaw puzzle called "Divorced". Living outside of my element, alone. The family has been divided and the children feel as if they are the blame. You try your hardest to explain that it's not their fault. You try to be as delicate as you can be by not placing the blame on the other parent. It's as if you putting on a band aid on a gunshot wound. Your heart is heavy, where there was once love now resides resentment and anger.The nights are longer than days. There are so many unanswered questions. None said it would be easy starting a new life, but I will survive!


  1. Hey Judie!

    I am so glad you put your blog together. I was talking to one of my friends in Indy and weirdly enough she is starting a single parents ministry at her church there. She said that it was going to be for both single and married women because there are many married women who operate as single mothers anyway, which I can definitely attest to. I will be checking you out! You be patient, and hold on because your circumstances will change for the better soon!

  2. great job Judi...keep it going.


  3. Hey sis,
    I am glad to see that you are express your feeling in poetry. Please keep up the good work. I hope that your blog will touch people lives.


  4. Great job Lady Judith of Norcross. I too have been through this situation as the child of a divorce. It is not easy for anyone having to face this life altering experience. Stay strong you can make it.

  5. Great Job Judie! Much success with your blog.